you’re gonna wanna sit down for this! chances are, you probably already are sitting, lazy hippie. in my day, men were men. and skirts were dames. and kids were factory workers. but not now. no sir. you’s gotta make sure no blood rushes to your head, because now everything’s gone all topsy-turvy! if you were a man, you had two things hanging in your closet; a black suit and a grey suit (but if a blouse entered the room, you best change into that black suit right quick). that was it. sure, you had them sassy boys that kept a pinstripe suit in that closet, but they kept a LOT in that closet, if you know what my drift is. but  you know what chaps my lips? the way you cola drinkers put anything on and walk out into daylight. i’ll admit, even i sometimes relax a bit at home. i’m not too proud of it, but i may loosen my tie a little after a large serving of brisket. but that’s in my own home, in front of my wife (if she can see me from the kitchen). but you’s kids go OUT into the general public looking like a 3 yr old’s self-published coloring book. horrible. take this sad example. the other day, the grandkids finished all their mutton and were allowed to watch the idiot box until night court came on (bull is so tall!). so they picked the disney channel. fine, wholesome entertainment. i THOUGHT.

this ne’er-do-well here is what is wrong with everything, everywhere! he’s on tv wearing the toddland ufo sheep sweater, telling kids to be cool like him and wear sweaters like this and buy foreign cars! why can’t we go back to a time when men were men? and the only color they might wear is red. red from the blood of another man who was trying to get fresh with your date. them’s were the days.